The Unrest, My Unrest is driving me Crazy, it may lead me to Craziness, but I know Craziness can never be an End, it can be a Symptom, an outcome, a stage, an origin but not an End.
Very recently I encountered the Existence of this Unrest in me which however has always been present more dominant than any other feeling. So this Unrest has made me know that you are Dissatisfied with something, however I have always been Ignoring someone other than Ego within me but my Endless Restlessness had made me believe that this Unrest has an Existence.
So now the puzzle is what to do with this Unrest, may be it is Just an Temporary matter solving which I would come to an inference that actually these are just dilemma's happening one by one to get my attention and their dominance is an engagement created deliberately since something must go on, a manifestation of nothingness trying to appear as something.
Now the puzzle turns to the question, who is the one in me who gets to know that this a temporary matter, may be all temporary matters are followers of Ego, and Ego is able to create them because it is having strong hold within, as powerful within as in outside.
So the answer is I am dissatisfied because I have Ego and why I let this Ego being so powerful because of my insurmountable believe that I am a unique creation, made specially, different from rest and has always been unable to get out of this believe.
(From the pages of my diary written on 23rd April 2012)